Stars in our eyes

When I was a lad I had stars in my eyes, thought I’d meet a lass with stars in her eyes and we’d make our dreams come true.

Then I married you.

Bitch.

Advertisements

About TheImaginator

35 year old sciolist living in Tokyo. I like swing dancing, Twitter word games, writing, using Stumbleupon.com, reading, and watching movies. I write stuff on my blog occasionally.
This entry was posted in Creative writing and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

44 Responses to Stars in our eyes

  1. jannatwrites says:

    Whoa, (or woe!) there is so much bitterness here. Sad when that happens…

  2. Rebecca says:

    Oh, this made me laugh. Starts all sweet and innocent, then BAM! Great ending…

  3. Quickstepp says:

    Yikes. That sucks…..the situation, not your piece.

  4. Ally says:

    Ouch! Clever take on the 33 words

    Ally:)

  5. KymmInBarcelona says:

    Oh. Ouch.

  6. troy P. says:

    Yes. MUCH more positive than the mope I put out there this week!

  7. shailajav says:

    Wow.. that last word changed the whole track! And I wondered how it was love gone wrong, when I started reading

  8. C.C. says:

    Ouch! Definitely feel the sting here. This reminds me of a saying I’ve seen floating around: “Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end you’ll wish you had a club and a spade.”

  9. Mike says:

    You ended your story with ‘Bitch’ I started mine with the same word. Hope we’re not both thinking of the same woman!

  10. And reality hits like a slap in the face! Don’t forget to come back and vote!

  11. Such bitterness. I love it, lines us well with the style of mine.

  12. Bitter and to the point. Very effective.

  13. Christine says:

    Ouch – the dashing of dreams. I love the opening line – it sounded like the start to a much longer, sweeter story. Made the punchline all the more dramatic.

  14. This cracked me up. But it’s sad how starry eyes turn to evil eyes for so many. Good one!

  15. Ashley K. says:

    Hahahaha. Started out so sweet and lovely and then wham! Sucker punch. Great job!

  16. Sara Healy says:

    There’s a real punch to your words. I hope it’s not based on true facts, but it is a perfect sting for “love gone wrong.” I liked it very much.

  17. yarnspinnerr says:

    There is a sting in the tale. Great take.

  18. Draug419 says:

    A lot of anger in that last word!

  19. atrm61 says:

    Ha!ha!What a turn around-loved it-poor fellow-the stars turned out to be stones!

  20. Oh wow, hope that is fiction! ha!

  21. Pingback: My World: My Poems – From Ashes I Rise | Dibbler Dabbler

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s