Mictlanpachecatl stood high upon his mountain, cupped his testicles with his hand and jiggled them as he bellowed insults in the direction of the ocean.
“Where art thou spineless jelly? Open thy mouth, I shalt defecate in thy throat anon!”
Vitztlampaehecatl looked up from the seas as he glided over the waters, punched the air with his middle finger and roared in defiance.
“Fie! Come o’er here then, thou molester of goats!”
Mictlanpachecatl’s eyes widened at that and his lips curled into a snarl; he took an atlatl from his belt, set a tepoztopilli into the hook and flung the spear with all his might. The projectile hurtled over the valleys and plains, whistling through the air at blistering speeds; the god of the southern wind saw this coming however, and dodged it easily.
“Hah! Thou art as predictable as always, o blustering fool. Forsooth, why not meet me in battle like a real warrior?” goaded Vitztlampaehecatl.
“Painted jellyfish! I’ll come at you anon and show you how ‘tis done!”
Mictlanpachecatl leapt off his mountain and flew through the air like a rock flung from a tematlatl as Vitztlampaehecatl rushed to meet him. They both hovered over Nuevo Laredo and rose higher into the air, swirling about each other as they each drew their maquahuitl and prepared for battle.
A vast cloud of dust leapt up from the ground as they whirled faster and faster, their obsidian edged weapons clashing as thunder and sending sparks of lightning forking intricately through the clouds of their breath. The god of the north wind was brutal and powerful, hammering away at his foe, yet the god of the south wind was shrewd and wary, and drove Mictlanpachecatl back with each parry and riposte.
In Stratford, Texas, Mary Lou Johnson stood outside the church, talking to Reverend Peterson.
“Better get indoors Mary, that’s some dust storm brewing there” he said, nodding at the veil of darkness appearing over the horizon.
Mary turned around then paused a moment, stared at the roiling clouds of sand awhile.
“Do you hear that?”
“Like…oh, never mind; just hearing things.”