Wrong place, wrong time

Bus speeding away

Copyright – Indira by way of Scott Vanatter

Fuck.  Head sppinning.  Thhhings out of focusss.

Wait.

Back up.

Bus.

Gone.

Fucking-bus-is-gone.

Gone.

Shit.

Phone.

No ssignal.

Shit!

Alright.  Shit.  Get a grip.  Where are we?

Road.  By some trees.

Fuck.  In the sticks.  Middle of nowhere.

Drunk.  How much we drink?  Oh…bar…beers…tequila…faces; everybody smiling…

Shit.

How do we get home?  Fucking bus’s gone.

Fuck.

Call a cab?  Where are we?  They’re going to ask, the cab company.

Walk?  To town?

Where’s town?

Fuck.

What’s that?  Howling?

Shit, feel cold.

Fuck.

Not a fox.  Foxes howl different, like screaming.

Dog?

Wolf?

Shit!  What’s that?

Oooh shit!

It’s behind me….

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About TheImaginator

35 year old sciolist living in Tokyo. I like swing dancing, Twitter word games, writing, using Stumbleupon.com, reading, and watching movies. I write stuff on my blog occasionally.
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34 Responses to Wrong place, wrong time

  1. Gabriella says:

    Your story could turn anyone into a teetotaller!

  2. I started out thinking it was going to be the frat bus with hangover or something but it ended up much worse than that. Nicely twisted at the end.

    janet

  3. wmqcolby says:

    Hahahahaha! Poor guy couldn’t get a break. This had some rhythm to it. It had a “feel” about it. A-number-1 classification for you!

  4. You twist things so well, excellent, 🙂

  5. Carrie says:

    I loved the chaotic jolting as his thoughts careened from place to place

  6. Shainbird says:

    Great read, so full of panic and heart pounding near the end! You portray panic very well!

  7. Sandra says:

    Great structure that added to the confusion/drama of the piece. Well done.

  8. I see what you mean. Great piece.

  9. zookyworld says:

    Cool format, approach — the confusion of the narrator comes right through. And that’s a seriously dramatic ending!

  10. OMG..I’ve been that drunk before. So nice to have grown up!

  11. troy P. says:

    My favorite of the week so far!

  12. There’s a moral hidden in there somewhere. Nicely done.

  13. Joe Owens says:

    Ah the best deterrent is a story told like this, but most don’t think it can ever happen to them.

  14. A wild ride for certain.

  15. Great blow by blow account of the worst night of his life. Not sure if he’ll live to have a worse one.

  16. kz says:

    a really horrifying ending. it’s an awesome twist. and i really liked the presentation. 🙂

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